Right now there is nothing. No outlet. No pain. Just oxygen and airplanes and screams and silence. Lots of silence. Inside my head, not on the street. There’s a purpose behind the silence my friends. My self-imposed gag. But you can’t stay silent. You wont. Would you?
I get it. It’s nothing. Nothing but bullshit. Piles of it. Semi-truck loads of it. And you’re heaving it at me.
I don’t have the answers anymore; I plied him with them. But he didn’t listen, and now all is lost. He wont … listen. Never did.
We’re all being tested; and you’ve signed up to proctor. Didn’t know that did you? Alone in your bed, your iphone balanced on a pillow by your head. You’re proctoring this. I got your last tweet. We’re failing you, friend.
Going to drop out. Out of the race. Out of this place. Like dull coins in your memory box, the value still there. But no oxygen, no air. Tarnished but true. Never lost. It’s what … we … must … do.
I feel his absence too, young friend, but he did this to himself. I wont address it. I will just overcome it. If you let me. If you’re silent too. Because thats what we need. Dignity and silence. Lots and lots of it. Walk with me. Walk away. I no longer care and he never did.
There are days and there are nights. There’s blackness and there is white. You know nothing of either and we’re going to keep it that way. Either you’re in or you’re out. On board or below deck. I don’t care either way. The noose is around his neck not mine and I warned him. I threw him a safety rope. He chewed it like a rabid dog. Broke free from his leash and look now, dear Echelon, at what he has done.
I tried kids, I tried. I cried kids, I cried. He’s empty inside. Lost. Angry. Empty. And he no longer cares.
I’ll bring you the magic, Tomo will too. But that’s the very least of this, and it’s all we can do.